I lost my dog..

I cant sleep, its 4.01 in the morning and I am as bright as a god damn button :( I got up to get a drink, do a blog and the dog needed a pee so I let him out... that was nearly an hour ago and he is not back yet..?!! My Dad will kill me if he is gone missing, OMG. Well I aint going looking for him so he is on his own and he knows where the  house is (I hope!) Im still feeling a bit like two pounds of dirt in a one pound bag and I am racking my brain to try and figure out what is wrong with me. What did I eat today that would make me feel so bad? I had a slice of wholemeal toast for my breakfast, and a small bowl of Weetabix minis (way too sweet wont be having them again btw..) and then I had an orange for a snack, and my dinner, which was chicken, a bit of mash and some mashed parsnips and carrots. Not TOO bad eh?? Ok. Then I had maybe two chocolates and a cup of tea later on and a chocolate or three before I went to bed. Ok.. THAT was a bit bad. But overall? Not my worst day tbh. SO I don't know why I am so sick. Might take a trip to the Dr's. I am a bit pissed with myself because I have not been drinking my water and I am finding it hard to drink it even when I try because I feel really stuffed and bloated all the time so it just sits in my tummy. And no, I have not done ANY exercise. Why? Because I am so god damn lazy. Period. And because exercise makes me feel like a big huffing puffing sweaty heap of dung. It's funny though, I was in bed tonight and thinking.. Wow. If I lost all the weight I could be a personal trainer!! How much more do you want in a trainer than someone who has been a former fattie themselves? Knowing how much you hate exercise? Knowing what buttons to press to make you work out? I would go to a former fattie personal trainer.
I just cant see myself as one of those "fitness fanatics" as much as I try to. I hope this changes for me, because I want to be healthy, I want to be fit and I want to live a long life and have loads of kids (the clocks a-ticking!) but I know i need the Lap band to help me. I cannot do it on my own AGAIN.
Oh, I got some fat free sorbet in Lydls tonight for all the ice cream demons out there, it is really nice and I am sure I will be eating bloody bucket loads of it when I have my band :))
Ok, I am signing off now. I hope I can sleep I hate being up all night and wrecked all day.
Thank you all for listening to my late night ramblings (the dog is back btw!!) and I will talk to you all tomorrow. Fat kisses xxxx